“Welcome! You have reached the rejection hotline. Please leave a message and we will get back to you… Never!”
As a person who has been rejected a lot of times on different levels, I could totally relate with how my friend was feeling when he called me the other day expressing how he was feeling. And even though I haven’t been able to completely deal or handle the process, I do know that for every time I get rejected, It first of all knocks me down real bad then urges me to try again and again and again.
Rejection is an unavoidable part of our life and strikes fear into everyone at least once in their life.The way we deal with it tells an important story about how we deal with issues and our ability to uphold our self-respect and dignity. A natural reaction, is to feel diminished, unloved, worthless, insecure and insignificant. When we are rejected, our dark side may want to innate a retaliatory strike to inflict a similar hurt.
As we all know or probably don’t know, there are different forms of rejection. From emotional (relationships) to Job related, to friendship, to health (transplant) but that’s not why we are here lol and they all hurt just as much but the ability to handle it and not let it drown you or leave you in a constant state of depression is what counts.
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I like to see it as part of a learning process. Like there’s a need to change something about the approach used. I also believe that there’s always something to take away from a failed ‘project’ even though as the preacher here I sometimes struggle with it and it takes me a while before I come around. On the emotional level, it’s pretty easy to blame oneself when a relationship doesn’t work. I have come to realise that this isn’t always the case as sometimes, the other party might not have been emotionally ready and still decided to come to you with their baggage (sucks right?) and cos of our human nature will try and pin it on you so they feel less guilty.
On the job related side, I see it as maybe the other applicant has more skills required for the role than I do. This doesn’t mean I am not worthy, it just means I didn’t meet the criteria, so what do I do, I build myself up more for the desired role and try again.
I don’t want to go on and on cos at this point I’d like to believe you all have gotten the point, plus as I type this I keep spacing out (I really don’t know why), so just bear in mind that rejection is a normal part of every process and how we handle it is very crucial.
You know I love you all right? Kisses.
Its definitely a learning process. I know from experience, it taught me persistence.
Great post.
deffinatlyshaz.wordpress.com
Persistence can be tough to learn but very rewarding in the end.
I’ve learnt to take rejection as part of my growing process.. take some time to be sad but never dwelling on it for too long and coming out stronger! Great post dear
Toyinwithfashion
Hi Lade. Thanks for dropping by.
Yup. Rejection happens. It could be shocking at first. When I was applying for jobs/ law internships in the UK was probably the hardest bit of rejection I’ve faced. I automatically assumed I was good enough. But it’s a learning process and if you keep at it, improve, take constructive feedback you’ll be fine!
KacheeTee.com
6 Questions on our Igbo Yoruba Inter-Ethnic Marriage
That part hurts. Thinking you’re the right fit and someone shoots you down. But yes, it’s a learning process.
I love this post! Getting over rejection requires effort but it can be done.
As with life everything must go on. Rejections will occur at some point in life, it will hurt, but in the end lessons will be learned.
Thanks for sharing.
Ah, rejection can torture one’s self -esteem. I love the objective stance you’ve applied in analysing its after-effects, indeed it does not mean that one is not worthy. But honestly, at that initial stage when the feeling of rejection is still fresh, it’s sometimes hard to stay positive. 🙂
In a way failure somewhat feels like success is rejecting one, but like you said, one simply needs to dust their shoulders and try again.
Thank you so much for sharing this message.
Lol @success is rejecting one. Oh my. Yes, staying positive can seem like a tall feat but we’ll be fine.
lol, I like the “failure somewhat feels like success is rejecting one,” part.
Hey! what happens if a person has already internalized it, when they’ve hit rock bottom and that particular episode just crushed them? What then?
What’s next when repeated rejection forces you to build walls and imprison yourself in your comfort zone, to become carefree and even often suicidal. what then…
Those are questions I’d love answers to on behalf of a much younger friend of mine.
Mindset is key. Yes repeated rejection can damage ones self esteem and can cause the walls to go up etc but what I do is, I tell myself im more than this. I challenge myself refusing to give into depression n that thought of im not good enough and then I pray. I pray about it n talk to people who I know have been through so much yet persevered and came out strong. It’s not an easy battle but it’s one that can be won.
Rejection sucks big time. It helps to have someone to talk to that understands the feeling.
Rejection to me equals der loss, while I push on and get even beta.
Hmmmm now thats another angle…
Rejection sucks big time but if you love yourself… The process won’t take that long. But Hey we all need Rejection at one point in our lives
FAVOURMOYSE BLOG
I’m visiting here for the first time and I think the writeups here are educative enough. It’s kool.
Hiii!!!
Thanks for stopping by. I hope you stay..
This is really educative. Nice write up.
I nominated you for the Liebster Award. I would be happy if you accept it.
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